Supporting someone who is grieving can be a challenging and delicate task, but it is also one of the most meaningful ways to offer comfort. Understanding that grief is a journey, not a destination, and approaching it with empathy and patience, can make all the difference. Listening with compassion and recognizing that everyone experiences grief differently are essential steps in being a supportive friend.

GriefShare, a program designed to assist those who are mourning, offers a structured yet compassionate environment. Meeting weekly at thousands of locations and online, this 13-week program combines educational content with the sharing of personal stories, helping participants navigate their grief and find a path to healing.

Bring Prepared Meals

Keeping the fridge and freezer full with meals that are easy to prepare and that can be reheated is a great way to support families in mourning. Soups, chili, and stews are good options as they are warm, comforting, and nourishing.

When offering support through meals, be considerate of the grieving family's needs and boundaries. If they seem overwhelmed, leave the food at their door with a thoughtful note.

Remember that grief is a unique experience for everyone. Avoid judgment or unsolicited advice. Instead, offer a listening ear and compassionate presence. Your support and understanding can make a significant difference during this challenging time.

Bring Household Necessities

A grieving family often needs items like toiletries, kitchen supplies, baby diapers and wipes, kids' snacks and toys, and pet food. Bringing these things is a thoughtful gesture that can help ease their financial stress.


A sympathetic ear is essential. Listening without judgment provides great support and allows families to process their grief in their way. Even when they repeat their stories, listening helps them absorb their loss and move toward acceptance.

Many grieving parents need assistance with their children and pets. Offering to take the kids to a playdate, drive them to sports practice or other events, look after the pets, or go grocery shopping can be incredibly helpful. These simple tasks free up their time to focus on other important matters.

Offer to Watch the Kids

Kids are often forgotten in the aftermath of a tragedy. While it is important to be there for the children and help them process the loss, they also need to feel normal and enjoy activities that bring them joy.

Younger children may struggle to comprehend the reality of death, and they may pose challenging questions during this difficult time. This can be especially true if the loss occurs around significant life events like birthdays or graduations.

Consider offering to take the children out for an enjoyable activity or to visit with friends. This can provide a welcome distraction from their grief and allow the family to spend quality time together. You could also offer transportation assistance, such as driving them to run errands or attend support group meetings. When making these offers, be sure to follow through with specific dates and times. This demonstrates your sincere care and commitment to supporting the family during their time of need.

Providing age-appropriate support and creating opportunities for the children to process their emotions can help ease their transition through the grieving process. Your thoughtful gestures can make a meaningful difference in helping the family navigate this challenging experience.

Offer to Drive

When families grieve, they need more than just the company of others. They also need practical help with tasks like shopping for groceries or running errands. Often, the bereaved may feel unable to ask for help and will avoid reaching out altogether.

Grieving people need someone to listen to their feelings and experiences. They will likely find comfort in talking about their loved one with other people who have lost a parent, spouse or child.

While talking about the death is helpful, it is important to not use statements that might be upsetting or triggering to the bereaved such as “I know how you feel” or "You'll get through this.". These types of comments can cause more harm than good. Instead, offer sympathy and empathy through your actions. Offer to drive them to a support group or errands.

Ask for Help

Many grieving parents don't ask for help because they fear being an inconvenience to others. If you offer, they will likely be grateful.

Serving prepared food, especially in disposable freezer-friendly containers, is an easy way to show you care. You can also manage some of their regular activities, such as shopping or running errands. Giving a ride is a simple but effective method. It allows them to spend time with their children, take care of preparations, or just leave the house.

Be patient as you listen to them talk about their lover. Grieving people often need to tell the story over and over, in full. Each report lessens the pain. Be careful not to ask them to move on or forget the past; it is a process that moves at its own pace.

Offer to Listen

A sympathetic ear is often the most comforting thing to offer a grieving loved one. Listening to them tell the same story over again may seem tedious, but it is a way for them to process and work through their emotions. Try to avoid offering unsolicited advice or telling them how you would have handled the situation if it were you.

Active listening, eye contact, and empathic tone of voice can all help them feel heard. Remember to check in with them frequently, especially around important milestones like birthdays, anniversaries, and holidays. This demonstrates that you care. Do not be offended if they decline your offer of assistance straight away; this is a typical part of the healing process. Just let them know that you're always available if they need you again.

Bring Flowers

Offering to bring flowerswhen they are grieving can be very comforting. This is especially helpful if the family doesn’t have other support systems they can reach out to. It is important to be respectful of their faith though and avoid sending them flower arrangements that may be offensive to them, such as a cross to a family of the Mormon faith.

It is also a good idea to bring care packages of self-care items such as toothbrushes and toothpaste. These things are often put on the back burner during the grieving process.

Families need to have time to grieve. Special occasions that remind us of the loss, such as holidays or birthdays, can bring back the pain for a while (Eismen & Stroebe, 2021). It is useful to prepare for these painful reminders.

Offer to Take the Kids to a Special Place

When children are grieving, they may need distractions to help cope with their feelings. Taking them on a fun outing can be a great way to provide comfort.

Grieving children may be more apt to find comfort in creative outlets like journaling or playing music, especially if they can connect with the person who died through it. Many of history's greatest artists and thinkers forged ahead through tragedy, including Frida Kahlo and F. Scott Fitzgerald.

Remember that grief is a lifelong process and the bereaved may need support long after the funeral service. Make sure you check in regularly with them, especially around certain times or dates, like anniversaries, holidays and birthdays, when the loss is likely to be more pronounced. Then, be prepared to offer additional help. This could include bringing them dinner or offering to watch the kids while they attend an in-person support group.

Offer to Help with Arrangements

Grieving families may require assistance long after the funeral has concluded and other mourners have returned home. Check in with them regularly, visit them, or send cards and letters. Be aware of their mood swings and the way they talk about their loved ones.

Prepare to listen, even if they repeat the same narrative in great detail. They may need to tell it several times to process the trauma and accept the death. Your comprehension is more valuable than your counsel. Also, be ready to receive phone calls and answer the door. These are little tasks that can make a significant difference for bereaved parents. They may also need assistance running errands. This may include getting food for them.

Offer to Take Care of the Pets

Grieving people may experience a variety of emotions after losing a pet. Their home is quieter and their main source of comfort is gone. It is important to let them know you are available to help take care of the pet(s) if they need it.

Surviving pets can also show signs of grief and sadness. They will still need food, exercise, attention, and comfort. If the pet has a routine, such as a daily walk or feeding schedule, try to keep it the same as they were used to.

It is important not to calm their spirits by telling them that the pet is in a better place or "looking on the bright side." This can make them feel lonely and isolated in their grief. Instead, distract them with heartwarming activities like taking them for a walk or teaching them a new trick to focus on something positive.