If my sex life is a town, then "Population: 1" is the sign you have to pass when you drive by. Sometimes I like everything about my dry spells. But other days are difficult, I focus on staying positive. When I ended my last relationship, I thought I would be back "there" soon. However, recovering from an emotionally abusive relationship did not do exactly what I thought. I find myself in a place where it is difficult to trust myself and others. I long for something deeper than casual sex but not as serious as a relationship.

Before entering another relationship, I need to do a lot of self-thinking, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have any fun. Just like the Grand Canyon or other deserts around the world, my drought is cruel and beautiful. This is something I learned during my study.

1. Love yourself
As Justin Bieber said: "You should love yourself." Seriously. you should. In the last relationship, I thought I had something wrong because I couldn't finish it. When searching for anxious moments full of "female sexual dysfunction," my responsibility far exceeded me. But the only thing that is abnormal is my relationship. When I started spending more time with myself (experimenting with different toys, postures and movements), I found that I could feel better than ever before, and I could do it in a minute if I wanted to. So try it! Buy a toy or two (please blush when your friend asks you why it shines). Loving yourself in this way, when you can tell your partner exactly what you like, you will prefer to end the boring spell.

2. Release and let go
This is a good time to release items that are no longer suitable in life. Send out clothes that are a little uncomfortable or even itchy. Rearrange your schedule to have more time to accompany you. Keep balance with all the new spaces in your life. Don't invest in work, but in what you like. It's time to let go of the things that don't work and embrace the things that feel good.

3. Date and have fun
A few months ago, I was looking for some fresh meat. The purpose of my going out is to get to know someone, but in the end I am disappointed to go home. Therefore, I decided to reduce the pressure. By dating and socializing without putting pressure on myself, I learned what kind of relationship I want. When I finally end the boring spell, it's worth waiting 100%.

4. Focus on other relationships
Your relationship with yourself is the most important relationship in your life, but healthy relationships with family and friends also deserve time and attention. I no longer worry about meeting someone on Friday night. Instead, I like to drink with my friends (not to mention that I can stay late or go to bed early, just like my grandmother). Regardless of your relationship status, make time for the people around you.

5. Take care of yourself
Whether you are arranging for female nursing visits or self-care, you must take all necessary measures to take care of yourself. Maybe you want to change your birth control options. I tried the IUD, but there has never been a happier method than now. If you notice a surge in emotions, talk to someone. Seeing a mental health professional provided me with the way out and verification I didn’t even know I needed. I was wasting time blaming myself and questioning the past, but when I started talking to someone, I was able to see the past and move on.

Whether you are enjoying a boring spell or wishing for a little "rain", please be nice to yourself. My personal boring decree is sometimes frustrating, but I believe that saying "not now" to sex gives me enough time to make myself comfortable with my skin. No matter what causes you to take a break from sex, we hope you can feel as energetic and ferocious as yourself. In those days when you long for your partner to enjoy happiness, please remember that the sex life in your dream does not have to include anyone, only you.

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